/**/ April 2017 - Procrastinating Polishr

Kardashian: The Musical - Drag Race S9 Nail Art

Hey Kitty Girls!

Drag Race is back bitches! Sure, it's been airing for over a month now, but this week felt like the show I know and love. We got a mini challenge! The Pit Crew were there! Celebrities waving back, it's like a dream come true!

Also we got drama and entertaintment in the form of Kardashian: The Musical, and Alexis Michelle's casting choices. I mean... tell me it wasn't strategic to give the girl who can't lip sync the main role?

evoo sai tss oh yow (via towleroad.com)
Nina moaned over not getting Blac Chyna for the entire damn episode, while Shea slayed the house down boots with her charisma, uniqueness, nerve and talent with a show stealing Blac Chyna, a neon monster runway, and this legendary moment that even had Ru gagged:

Good Morning Bitches - Drag Race S9 Nail Art

Good morning bitches!

Is anyone else struggling to keep up with the wild swings between total claws out drama and heartwrenching tragic tales this season? 

It's so over the top - which, OK, I know I'm watching a reality show about drag queens, but damn - calm your boobsforqueens dot com (*wink*) tits please producers. It's exhausting. Valentina needs to teach them some focus.

via The Film Experience
Workroom weirdness aside, we finally got an actual entertaining maxi challenge! There were some spectacular failures from the Not On Today team - I'm looking at you Trinity and Peppermint. Eureka and Nina saved it from being a total mess with their edible diy drag segment, and Charlie and Cynthia would have been downright forgettable had they not been so cringeworthy.

Good Morning Bitches was owned by Sasha Velour and Shea Coulee with their repressed 80's lesbian power couple exploding with awkward sexual tension. This is a ship I am absolutely going to board.

Because there was only a 12 second runway this week (which was disappointing anyway after my mishearing it as 'naughty 90's') I took my inspiration from the challenge instead!

Draggily Ever After - Drag Race S9 Nail Art

Hey kitty girls!

What is happening this season? The episodes feel way too short (because at 39ish minutes, they are), with approximately 342 queens in the competition only a few get any air time at all, Ru's upper lip is missing and the lighting technician seems to be working under the assumption that the runway must be bathed in the most obnoxiously colourful lighting possible at all times. UGH.

At least the content has been entertaining. This week Cynthia got to explain a few things to Kimora, like what an "adjetive" is (hint: it contains a 'c') and the origin story of "cucu". Safe to say the world is still just as in the dark about the origins of cucu as they ever were.

Read the recaps at Bland Canyon if you want to scream inappropriately with laughter.

Again we don't get a mini challenge, which meant more time on the runway watching for glimpses of our queens behind the glaring disco ambulance lighting.

She Done Already Done Brought It On - Drag Race S9 Nail Art

Hey kitty girls!

I think Trinity Taylor best sums up my feelings about last weeks episode (episode 2):

Ahhh omg yasss... noooo shit... halp no wait I'm OK
The return of cucu Cynthia Lee Fontaine was no surprise so I'm glad they got it over with in the first millisecond of the episode. Seems not much has changed with her (health issues aside), the cucus were running wild and I'm not sure how much longer I can deal.

Lisa Kudrow turned up and spouted a catchphrase in one of the most awkward workroom visits I've seen - why was she there again?

The cheerleading challenge consumed the episode, and while it brought some welcome drama - and iconic gif-able moments - it was so poorly shot and presented I had no fucking idea what was going on.

Will the runway save us?

Oh. My. Gaga! - Drag Race S9 Nail Art

Hey kitty girls!

Back back back again for another season of the best show on television, RuPaul's Drag Race! Even after being spoiled with two seasons last year it felt like an eternity waiting for the premiere, but it was totally worth the wait. Every queen has come to slay this year and I am certifiably gagged.

As well as being served fierce werkroom looks, we were treated to two runways and the best guest judge to ever grace the show - the amazing, incomparable Lady Gaga. The whole episode felt completely dedicated to Gaga and while I lived, I'm really looking forward to getting to know the queens a little better this week.

Somehow, out of 36 looks I managed to pick three to inspire some nail art - but I've definitely keep a few more ideas tucked in the back of my brain that you might see pop up on my Instagram in the coming weeks. Now let's see who made the cut!